JEE SIMPLIFIED

If you’re successful, the story looks all glorious. But I don’t want to sugarcoat my journey anyhow, because raw stories are so much more interesting!

To fast-forward to the day of the results, I’d cracked JEE Adv 2018 with an AIR of 389 (General Category) but I was mildly disappointed because I had more expectations. But looking back at the beginning of 11th, had I even expected this?!

Gear up for a surreal story of failures and glory!

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I was in the State(SSC) board until 10th Standard and the way of teaching science was so bad that I started to hate it. I somehow mugged it up and decided that I would NEVER touch science books again(but destiny had different plans.) So I had decided to take up Commerce and (maybe)become a CA. I was having fun during the vacations because what else! Suddenly one day, my mom found the scholarship test by Careers360 and next I knew I was signed up and was appearing for the test. I had no clue why. I ended up getting a zonal rank 12 with a 97.99 percentile. Next I appeared for Sinhal’s and Vidyalankar’s tests. All through I wasn’t clear if I was even going to take up Science but I was just taking up the opportunities. The counsellor at Vidyalankar had a huge role in changing my mind. After seeing my results, she was damn sure that I should be pursuing science because my grip over Maths and logical reasoning was pretty good. And that, if I didn’t end up in a good college, I can always switch streams after 12th. I was convinced that it was worth a shot.

I enrolled for mock lectures at Vidyalankar but soon a colony senior suggested me to join PACE. I blindly followed his advice, I’d no clue it would turn out to be an amazing decision. But by then it was too late! It joined the June 6th batch and batches had started right from April. I was in the last batch, batch 7 but made sure to keep up with whatever was going on in class and the homework and the results did show some consistency, which made me work even harder. I got along with my batchmates quite well!

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(Happy faces in batch 7!) But it didn’t last long. After the first major test, I was transferred to batch 1! It was a completely different environment, with studious discussions even during breaks! Plus batch 7 was lagging in portion, so I had to cover up the remaining part through video lectures. It was tough to cope up initially, but slowly slowly the ice started to break. I could realize that my new batchmates were even more passionate and the competition only pushed me to be on my toes. Days, weeks, months went on with tests, ranklists, discussions, doubt sessions and so on. We also had a “Doubts” whatsapp group which was quite active throughout. I was stressed at times due to bad performance and questioned whether I really belonged there! Tough Physics problems where I coudln’t even think of the approach made me doubt myself more. But I could see myself rise slowly in the ranklist when I was working hard. So I knew what I had to do! Then began the race of competing with SELF. I started tabbing my institute and center ranks and worked on improving weak areas. Each test was about trying out a new strategy to see what works best for me!

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Right then, the formation of an elite top 50 ACHIEVER’s Batch was announced. Definitely, there was a lot of hype about who would get in and pressure was piling up. I had expectations from myself but my institute rank was around 80 by then, getting it below 50 was tough. The test was done and I was ranked 69th and didn’t make it to the batch! The next one month was pretty gloomy for me. I was always worried about what the students in the Achiever’s batch upto. 4 students from batch1 were selected and I started to feel inferior to them. I felt as if students in batch1 were laughing at me. But back then I didn’t know how to channel all this frustration into motivation. I required a lot of support from my mom, who assured me that I’d tried my best. But the defining day was when during the organic chemistry class the professor announced in front of the class: “Ye ladka bada mehnati hai, doubt puchta tha, acha karega.” It was a ray of hope in a dark tunnel because I wouldn’t, in my wildest dream, imagine that a strict professor like him could appreciate me in front of the whole class. I was back on track. I contacted my best friend in the Achiever’s batch and used to check with him about any extra material they’d got. It was after 2 months that the next test was up and this time I managed to get through! I was ranked 37 and had even beaten one of the four friends in achiever’s batch. I was to move into a new batch, ONCE AGAIN!

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This time too, they were ahead in the syllabus. I was trailing behind, grasping the previous material and keeping up with current lectures. We had combined Video Conference lectures with achievers across centres in India and it was a revelation to know that there were aspirants outside our centre too. I had been a frog in the well, limiting my perspective by the competition around me. But there was so much more outside! We’d almost completed 11th and I was quite thrilled with whatever had happened in the last year!

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At the onset of 12th, the struggle to stay afloat in achievers, the inferiority complex and the problem-difficulty level, all had rose. At the same time, meeting my old friends made me realise that their batch was being neglected and we were being given extra assignments. I suddenly became aware of how great the expectations were from me. We had discussions going on in the common Achiever’s whatsapp group. I got to interact with people from Vagad, Andheri, Nashik and we became “virtual” friends, we’d never even seen each other’s faces! Sometimes we would end up discussing the issues, crib about the hectic schedule and it relieved us so much! The syllabus was nearing an end we were totally blank about what were we supposed to do next.

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This phase of “no-classes” was filled with anxiety because you don’t know what others are upto and how they’re utilising their time. The best thing to do then is set weekly goals for yourself, revise concepts, revisit incomplete chapters and identify and work on your weak areas. Also, solving chapterwise questions and mock tests became a part of the schedule. But maintaining motivation during this phase was really critical! At this point, our discussion groups were a saviour as someone or the other kept posting their queries and kept the josh high!

Weekly mock tests and revision lectures began and the fluctuation in my rank often invoked feelings of fear. I couldn’t say for sure where I would end up in the final JEE exam because PACE had around 4000 students and there were 10L+ aspirants out there! But everyone around me were really supportive and helping, I couldn’t have asked for anything more. But one day I learnt that some of my friends were provided with a mentor by the coaching and I felt betrayed and belittled. It started eating me from inside. After a week, I managed to draft a message to one of my profs and he was gracious enough to help me get in touch with the mentor. The mentor had a plethora of resources and I realised that I was running out of time. Through the mentor, sometimes I even got to know what my other batchmates were upto. From here on until JEE there were minute fluctuations and days kept flying. The days leading upto JEE were immersed in practicing and reviewing papers and I had to let go off self-doubt for a toss because I couldn’t afford any distractions at that moment. The night before JEE, I was ofcourse sleepless. I was going through so many emotions! After the exam(the exam itself was pretty interesting, will cover in some other answer hopefully), the fact that it had all ended, and that I was a free bird, was refreshing!

Here are some key learnings from my journey:

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1. From Day1 to “the JEE Day”, there will be several off-putting days, but triumph them with the fire within you. It’s okay to cry, but always remember what made you cry.

2. Through my prep days, I was dearly missing people, because I’d cut off all my social circles for the entire 2 years. But in the end, it was all worth it, really!

3. JEE taught me to establish an identity of my own. It was the confidence that these 2 years gave me that helped me break past the protective shield and security of my parents and venture out of my comfort zone.

4. I now realise that it was the amazing people I met, who made my journey what it was. 2 years back, I could’ve never foreseen even 1/10th of this enthralling journey.

5. Since I was so constrained about studying, I realized the things I was missing the most: dance and writing. The love has only grown further and I’m pursuing these amazing hobbies now.

6. Take a leap of faith. You never know what the future has in store for you. Had I not agreed to the counsellor’s point at Vidyalankar and continued with commerce, my life would’ve been completely different today.

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Preparing for JEE was a phase, I can live over and over again. It’s because the phase transformed me into a sincere, focused and enthusiastic being and made me believe in my abilities. It taught me resiliency and how to deal with the hurdles.

Would I change anything if I were to go back? Probably, no! I hope there was something you found of help from my story!

See ya, may the force be with you!

(Some good memories, we won the best short film award in the Pace Annual Fest!)